Jocularity

[KMixson]

Once, I thought I was wrong. But it turns out I was mistaken.

So you were wrong twice

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Actually, I have been wrong a whole hellava lot more than twice, but that is my story and I am sticking to it.

 

[LDUBS]

The past, the present, and the future walked into a bar.

It was tense.

 

[LDUBS]

Lance is a pretty uncommon name these days.

But in medieval times, people were named Lance a lot.

 

[LDUBS]

To distinguish between an alligator and a crocodile,

pay attention to whether it sees you later or in a while.

 

[LDUBS]

Saw a guy collapse on the luggage carousel at the airport.

He seems to be slowly coming around.

 

[LDUBS]

The guys who invented the merry-go-round and the Ferris wheel never met each other.

They traveled in different circles.

 

[R2K]

What did the Duck say when he purchased chap stick?

Put it on my bill…


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[R2K]

Why does the seagull fly over the ocean instead of the bay?

Because they would be called Baygulls


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[R2K]

Why do they say amen at the end of songs?

Because they are Hymns not Hers


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[LDUBS]

It's national Diarrhea Awareness Week.

Runs till Friday.

 

[LDUBS]

What did the Duck say when he purchased chap stick?

Put it on my bill…


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Hahaha - that's the spirit!

 

[LDUBS]

A guy told me he was addicted to buying old Beatles records.

I told him sounds like you need help.

He says he already has that one.

 

[KMixson]

If an electricians kid gets in trouble, do they get grounded?

 

[LDUBS]

I was watching the Bermuda Philharmonic Orchestra.

The guy on the triangle disappeared.

 

[LDUBS]

I asked this really old looking Pirate how old he was.

He said Aye Matey.

 

[R2K]

What do you call a love sandwich

Lettuce alone


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[LDUBS]

50 Cents got hungry.

So, 58.


(Please don't ban me for this one).

 

[LDUBS]

Parallel lines have so much in common.

It's a shame they will never meet.

 

[KMixson]

Three moles are traveling through a tunnel.
The first on says, "I smell sugar".
The second one says, "I smell cinnamon".
The third one says, "I smell molasses".

 

[GTS225]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zXDo4dL7SU

Roger