The Marina I work at (half days....its good to be retired) is on a lake. Our dock is down a well shaded canal. Free from tide and free from wind.
You absolutely would not believe the darn knots I see when folks tie up their boats to our dock. The record for a rope around a piling so far is 15.....a combination of wraps, half hitches and knots! "Gee Vern.....Ya' think that'll hold 'er?"
But.....it you want to go see something REALLY funny. Go over to the Coast of Florida or somewhere that has Ocean or Gulf access and watch the shenanigans of people putting boats in the water or taking them out! The bigger the boats the better the show is.
It was a busy Sunday morning in Sarasota Bay. All the flashy offshore wannabe racers used this ramp to launch. I was staying across the street at what was then the Sarasota Hyatt. Was there for a dealer meeting for Johnson or Evinrude and the day was a free day before the dealers arrived. Walked across the street and sat on a bench to watch the shenanigans. Didn't have long to wait.
I watched a family put an offshore performance boat with three V-6 Mercs in the water. Man (with a "Mister T" starter kit of gold chains) had to stop before the hull hit the water and let his family completely unload out of the dually, load the boat with coolers, bags, etc. (on the busy ramp) and the kids had to get in the boat. Boats and trucks are starting to stack up. Mr. Gold Chains gets back into the dually, finally negotiates the boat into the water, and promptly ties the boat to the dock .... effectively shutting down access to that ramp, leaves, and parks his truck. Folks are getting wayyyy wound up now. Longer line of trucks and boats. He gets back to the boat and hoisted his butt and his gold chains into the boat, turns on all his battery switches after getting the kids up and off that seat he had to raise to get to the switches, stows some gear, has some "words" with his wife, and proudly returns to the stand-up bolstered driving station. Things get interesting at this point. Turns the first key on......nothing. Second key........nothing.......third key.........nothing. He furiously moved the shifters, he looks at the keys, he turns around and looks at the still tilted engines. He goes back and gets the kids off the seat again to verify the switches are all on or switches them to "all". Tries the keys again.....Every darn battery in the boat was door nail dead!! This of course meant that all the preceding procedures had to be reversed, this time without the advantage of outboard engine power AND he had to butt in line with his truck and trailer to do it!! Two completely different emotions were now in full swing. "Ramp Rage" was in full swing, and others were loudly laughing their butts off well within earshot of him....... and the only thing I was missing, while sitting on that bench, was a bag of popcorn.
Sorry to hijack the thread but watching "Credit Card Captains" and their boats can be very entertaining at times and the knots on pilings reminded me of it.