Funnies

[Stand Up]

A pregnant woman is in a car accident and falls into a deep coma.
Asleep for nearly 6 months, when she wakes up she sees that she is no longer pregnant and frantically asks the doctor about her baby.
The doctor replies, 'Ma'am you had twins! A boy and a girl. Your brother came in and named them.'
The woman thinks to herself, 'Oh No, not my brother... he's an *****!'
She asks the doctor, 'Well, what's the girl's name?' Denise.' 'Wow, that's not a bad name, I like it!
What's the boy's name?' .........
'Denephew'

 

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[Lost But Happy]

 

[Lost But Happy]

 

[Lost But Happy]

 

[Lost But Happy]

 

[LDUBS]

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OK, this reminded me. Years ago I had occasion to use the restroom in the Munich airport. The urinals had a black fly pic imbedded in the porcelain. It is pretty clear what the intent was.

 

[LDUBS]

 

[Lost But Happy]

 

[Stand Up]

 

[Lost But Happy]

 

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[Stand Up]

A young woman was pulled over for speeding on her motorcycle. A Colorado state trooper walked up to her, flipping open his ticket book. She said, “I bet you were going to try to sell me a ticket to the Colorado troopers ball”. He replied, “Colorado state troopers don’t have balls”. There was a moment of silence. He closed his ticket book, tipped his hat, got back in his patrol car and left.

 

[Stand Up]

 

[GTS225]

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I'm not sure......are they Chicago Bears?
Aahahahaha.....I just kill myself!

Roger